No such thing as "The Perfect Movie Franchise!"

I was not at all surprised by the largely negative response displayed by “Star Wars” fans Oct. 30 upon hearing the news of filmmaker George Lucas’ selling of Lucasfilm to Walt Disney Co. Then came the announcement that “Star Wars” Episodes 7, 8 and 9 are coming, beginning in 2015.

I could almost set my watch by all the negative postings on the Internet. In fact, I did set my watch to see how long it would take a friend of mine from Chicago to email me his George Lucas-bashing tirade. I received his email within eight hours just as I predicted would happen.

What amazes me is how fans are still infuriated with the prequel trilogy, saying how much Lucas destroyed their childhoods, giving us Jar Jar Binks. I got news for all the negative Nancys out there. There is no such thing as the perfect movie franchise, “Star Wars” included.

I know, I know. Everyone from Middle-earth and devoted Christopher Nolan fans will tell me how wrong I am saying The Lord of the Rings and the upcoming Hobbit trilogy, and the Dark Knight trilogy are examples of the perfect movie franchises.

I’ll have more to say on that in a moment. For now, all you haters of Jar Jar Binks, the lousy acting, the bland dialogue, intergalactic politics and emotionally empty digital effects spectacles that were, in viewers’ minds, the prequel trilogy need to be reminded of some of the major misfires of sequels past that almost immediately dashed in some cases future installments.

• "Star Trek: The Motion Picture" (1979) and "Star Trek V: The Final Frontier" (1989): The one thing that’s always been said about the Star Trek movies is that the even numbered ones are always better than the odd-numbered sequels, a notion direct J.J. Abrams may have put to rest with the success of the 11th Trek feature in 2009 that rebooted the franchise. That won’t erase, however, the two “Search for God” installments with the first Star Trek movie that almost wrecked the big screen franchise before it even started. I suppose if there is any consolation at least Star Trek V’s “Search for God” plot had humor watching Kirk (William Shatner) and Dr. McCoy (DeForest Kelley) sing Row, row, row your boat at a campfire while Mr. Spock (Leonard Nimoy) attempted to comprehend the meaning of the words.

• "A View to a Kill" (1985) and "Quantum of Solace" (2008): James Bond has been around for 50 years, but that doesn’t mean all 22 films lived up to fans expectations. For the longest time I thought "Moonraker" (1979) was the worst but now I can say it’s "A View to a Kill" which I put on the list of bad movies I love to hate. One the subject of "Quantum of Solace", it seems the major problem fans had was its running time of 106 minutes making it the shortest of all Bond movies. Bond star Daniel Craig has a different take, however, on the whole debacle.

On ‘Quantum’, we were fucked,” Craig told Indiewire. “We had the bare bones of a script and then there was a writer’s strike and there was nothing we could do. We couldn’t employ a writer to finish it. I say to myself, ‘Never again’, but who knows? There was me trying to rewrite scenes – and a writer I am not.”

• "The Godfather Part III" (1990): No, it wasn’t the miscasting of Sofia Coppola as the daughter of Don Michael Corleone (Al Pacino) and the casting of George Hamilton as the crime family lawyer. I think everyone will agree the character we all missed most was Robert Duvall’s Tom Hagen.

• "Spider-Man 3" (2007): Too many villains (New Green Goblin, the Sandman, Venom) and too many subplots are among the reasons why Sony likely decided to let director Sam Raimi go and reboot the franchise with a new cast five years later telling essentially the same story as the 2002 movie.

• "Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" (2008): Russian agents, aliens, UFOs, nuclear testing, Shia LeBeouf and no Sean Connery. At least Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) and Marion (Karen Allen) tied the knot.

Which brings me to the Lord of the Rings/Hobbit trilogies and The Dark Knight trilogy. For me, to sit through a three-hour plus sword and sorcery epic it can’t feel like I have sat there for over three hours. Director Peter Jackson’s fantasy epics, while they are likely the most faithful to author J.R.R. Tolkien’s books are endurance tests to see how long it takes before I need to stretch my legs.

I had no problem with "The Dark Knight" (2008) echoing "The War on Terror" in which Bruce Wayne/Batman (Christian Bale) was like President George W. Bush giving law enforcement agencies carte-blanche to go after terror suspects and Heath Ledger’s Joker as Osama bin Laden in clown make-up. I didn’t, however, need to be pummeled with echoes of such issues as the Occupy Wall Street movement, the war on the rich and terrorism with "The Dark Knight Rises" (2012). The Aurora, Colo. massacre didn’t help either.

I will admit my reaction that a new Star Wars movie is coming is mixed. Since "Star Wars – Episode III: Revenge of the Sith" (2005) came out, I have said the movie/toy franchise needs to do what Star Trek did after "Star Trek: Enterprise" (2001-2005) went off the air and figure out a way to reinvent itself.

Now with Disney taking over “The Empire” (Lucas will only serve as creative consultant; Kathleen Kennedy will produce), this might be the reinvention the franchise was needing.

What it comes to the mass hatred fans have for the prequels and how they think the Disney deal makes them utter the infamous Star Wars quote, “I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” I quote the words of Governor Tarkin (Peter Cushing) in "Star Wars – Episode IV: A New Hope" (1977).

“This bickering is pointless.”

If only I had the ability to invoke that invisible chokehold using “The Force” like Darth Vader did. Unlike Admiral Motti in that Death Star conference scene who was saved by Tarkin from succumbing to Vader’s wrath, there would be no one to keep me from using “The Force” on all those negative Nancy’s who despise the prequels and the upcoming Episodes 7-9 as I utter the words of the Sith Lord, “I find your lack of faith disturbing.”

©11/13/12

Facebook and political rants don't mix

The “highly decorated soldier” ABC news reporter Martha Raddatz spoke about at the vice-presidential debate Oct. 11 is not only one who is dismayed by this election.

Raddatz told Democratic Vice President Joe Biden and Republican Vice-Presidential candidate Paul Ryan that the soldier told her on the subject of this presidential election “the ads are so negative, and they are all tearing down each other rather than building up the country.”

I too am fed up especially when it comes to all the negative postings I have seen on Facebook from friends regardless of their right or far liberal left-wing ideals whether I agree with them or not.

To quote a friend of mine on Facebook several weeks ago whose fake name I will refer to as “Silent Bob” based on that silent character Kevin Smith played in "Clerks" (1994), using his exact words and lettering, “If ALL you’re posting is political or religious opinions, I am opting to UNSUBSCRIBE. There is nothing you can say that will change my mind. Honestly, I couldn’t give a shit.”

This posting was followed a couple weeks later by another of my Facebook friends whose fake name I will refer to as “Mace Windu”, the Jedi Knight character Samuel L. Jackson played in the Star Wars prequels (1999-2005). Windu asked all his Facebook friends to post both the good and bad things about both the Democratic and Republican parties. Last week he threw in the towel.

“I tried to get everyone from all political parties to share their opinions with an open-minded approach,” Windu wrote. “What I’m still reading is the same as always. Each post is something bad about the other political party. My goal was to have us view things as a whole and not one sided. Meaning, I wanted you to post the good and bad about your political party as well as the other political party. My intention is not to agree or disagree or even debate on what you post. I was hoping to see how well versed you are in the political arena. If all we can do is post bad things, then we are just like the news media (Fox, CNN, MSNBC, ABC).”

This only proves my theory that social media and political rants, regardless of how passionate one is about President Obama or Mitt Romney don’t mix. If the unwritten rule in the workplace is that employees refrain from discussing politics, race issues and religion with others especially if it’s among those who don’t share the same opinions, the same applies to Facebook.

I have had enough of the US versus THEM attitude people have adopted when it comes to politics where not a single person it seems can come up with just one good thing they can say about the Democratic and Republican parties or about President Obama and Mitt Romney. I can at least come up with two positive things I can say about President Obama though I disagree on 99.9 percent of everything else he has done the past four years. From Congress and talk radio to social media, the bile foul smelling attitude has always been and continues to be “I’m right”, “You’re wrong,” “Liberal is a cussword,” “Republicans are nothing but a bunch of rich, white, racists who want dirty air and water and will do anything to throw grandma off a cliff,” and “I will not rest until every Democrat is voted out of office as per Rush Limbaugh and the conservative right wing.”

I’d much rather see my Facebook page inundated with pictures of cats and dogs up for adoption, updates from newly married husbands who can’t wait for work to be over so they can be with their significant other, trivial postings that say “so-so” is off on vacation somewhere and depressing photos of me in a tux at my sister’s wedding back when I had hair and was 80 pounds lighter, which by the way is the only time you will ever see me dressed in a suit and tie other than at a job interview or at a funeral, be it someone else’s or my own.

The negativity I have seen from friends on Facebook has gotten so bad in recent months that I have gotten to the point of saying to myself, “You know, I like you but if you continue to go on your political pro Barack Obama soapbox and Mitt Romney slam-a-thons then I am going to delete you almost as quickly as it takes for me to either register or drop a course through the Dallas County Community College District’s software program.”

I don’t want to be “that guy.”

For the time being, as the days wind down to election day and as I continue to see friends’ one sided political postings, I’ll just wish how much CEO Mark Zuckerberg and the powers that be at Facebook could come up with a “hide political posts” button so I can still like all my contacts after this election is over to quote that Someecard cartoon I saw weeks ago.

©10/21/12

Preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse

So, there I was browsing the Internet early one morning last week when while listening to the TV I heard an ABC news anchorwoman report the following.

“It has been established that persons who have recently died have been returning to life and committing acts of murder. A widespread investigation of funeral homes, morgues, and hospitals has concluded that the unburied dead have been returning to life and seeking human victims. It's hard for us here to be reporting this to you, but it does seem to be a fact.”

Ok. Maybe it didn’t exactly happen that way. Actually, it didn’t happen at all. The quote, however, is real as I got it from imdb.com researching useless trivia information on director George A. Romero’s black and white 1968 horror classic, "Night of the Living Dead", in which the undead come back to feast on the living.

If such strange events were to happen and this was the beginning of “The Zombie Apocalypse”, I imagine such news reports would sound reminiscent to those live press conferences seen in Romero’s film.

With all the many life-threatening catastrophes we are faced with, I’d like to think the one thing we don’t ever have to worry about is the dead coming back to life and attacking the living.

Personally, I have never understood horror fans’ obsession with zombies. Director Martin Scorsese said it best when he told Movieline that he prefers vampires over zombies, though I am not too fond of bloodsuckers either.

“A vampire, quite honestly, you could have a conversation with,” Scorsese said. “He has a sexuality. I mean the undead thing. Zombies. What are you going to do with them? Just keep chopping them up, shooting at them, shooting at them. It’s a whole other thing that apparently means a great deal to our culture and our society.”

Indeed. Zombies have no real personality. They move slow, make howling type noises and I am fairly certain given they either just came out of their coffins or at the local morgue that chances are they give off a foul odor.

The only time I have ever seen zombies in movies exhibit any life like personality is in "The Return of the Living Dead" (1985) where the undead actually spoke, albeit less than maybe 50 words which was either “Brains!” and “More brains!” whenever they saw a live human walk in on them, or after chomping down on an entire police department, one zombie tells someone on the radio to “Send more cops.”

I won’t deny that when the Dallas area had that outbreak of tornados last April, the first thing I did in case one touched down where I live was grabbed my wallet, credit cards, check books and two USB flash drives with all my files on them. Prior to that, however, I have never once given a thought about preparing for a national emergency, zombies or not. Disaster preparedness is not the first thing on my mind. Sure, I have a flashlight somewhere in the house, but I have no idea where it is, nor do I know if it even works.

That’s obviously the thinking behind the Homeland Security Department’s mock announcement a few weeks ago educating the public on how to better prepare themselves should a zombie apocalypse actually happen which includes having an emergency evacuation plan, a change of clothes, water, medications and flashlights.

“The theory: If you’re prepared for a zombie attack, the same preparations will help during a hurricane, pandemic, earthquake or terrorist attack,” said an article on The Huffington Post’s website.

I can’t help but feel how sad that is where the only way the public might actually pay any attention to this is if a national emergency is inspired by a cheaply made horror film that spawned five sequels, several cannibalistic imitations, a comic book series and a current TV series on AMC the past four decades.

On the other hand, art has a funny, or in most all cases, a not so funny way of imitating life.

Should the day come in which I see a crowd of slow-moving figures coming out of the cemetery down the street and start dragging people from their vehicles causing traffic jams, rest assured before leaving work, I’ll make sure to check the back seat of my car should a zombie be waiting for me lying on the floor. Then I’ll drive off jamming to such tunes as “The Sun Ain’t Gonna’ Shine Anymore” by The Walker Brothers and Johnny Cash’s “The Man Comes Around” on my iPod.

Like those four survivors who took refuge at a mall in the 1978 original and 2004 remake of Dawn of the Dead, I’m racing to take over the nearest shopping center.

I got dibs on Dallas’ NorthPark Mall. They got a Lego store and a movie theater I can spend my remaining end of days in.

©10/2/12

Whether conservative or liberal, Hollywood should stay out of presidential politics

Oscar winning director/actor Clint Eastwood’s surprise appearance at the Republican National Convention in Tampa, Florida drove home the belief I have always held which is that the Hollywood elite should stay the hell out of the political presidential spectrum completely whether they are conservative or liberal.

That doesn’t mean they should not back a certain candidate. All I am saying is they should do it quietly or make it as conspicuous as possible to the point it doesn’t turn off their fan base and makes one ask, “Why the hell did I ever watch your movies, tv shows or listen to your music in the first place if you are going to bash the previous president, the GOP and vice versa?”

It is no secret that when any Hollywood conservative comes out of the closet, they run the risk of being blacklisted by the studios because of their politics. Just look at the backlash Eastwood got from the Hollywood liberals following his appearance.

I won’t deny that Eastwood made a couple good points during his awkward ad-libbed speech that made me wonder if, like President Obama, was in serious need of a teleprompter to effectively get his points across.

In speaking about what I assume was his reaction to President Obama’s election win in November 2008, “Everybody was crying,” he said. “Oprah was crying. I was even crying…and I haven’t cried that hard since I found out that there is 23 million unemployed people in this country.”

“Now that is something to cry for because that is a disgrace, a national disgrace, obviously this administration hasn’t done enough to cure that,” Eastwood continued. “Whatever interest they have is not strong enough, and I think possibly now it may be time for somebody else to come along and solve the problem.”

I agree as I did with his comments as to who owns this country.

“We – we own it. It is not you owning it, and not politicians owning it. Politicians are employees of ours. And -- so -- they are just going to come around and beg for votes every few years. It is the same old deal. But I just think it is important that you realize that you're the best in the world. Whether you are a Democrat or Republican or whether you're libertarian or whatever, you are the best. And we should not ever forget that. And when somebody does not do the job, we got to let them go.”

The problem is I would much rather have heard this from someone who is or already held political office.

When a movie star makes an appearance at a presidential convention like Eastwood did, it’s that one event that takes away everything else the other politicians said the past three days.

Such is the reason I will not watch the Democratic National Convention as I know the list of Hollywood celebrities from Jessica Alba and Eva Longoria to such rock bands like The B-52s is going to be the equivalent of the stars we see on the red carpet every February shortly before the opening ceremonies of the Academy Awards. The many appearances I have seen President Obama make the past three years on The View, late night and slow jamming the news with Jimmy Fallon have left me asking the question is he the Entertainer-In-Chief or the Commander-In-Chief? Is this really what the Democratic Party stands for? Hollywood?

If people are going to argue that religion and politics don't mix, the same should be said then for the entertainment industry.

I know full well that both Barack Obama and Mitt Romney are wealthy. It’s bad enough I got to listen to two presidential candidates who think they feel my pain living from paycheck to paycheck barely able to make ends meet trying to sell me reasons why I should vote for them.

I don’t need to watch multi-million dollar movie stars and musicians promote their presidential candidate feeding me their liberal conservative opinions. They are not politicians. They work in the entertainment industry. They should all shut up and do what they are paid millions to do which is act and sing.

I know that is a weak argument because the first thing out of someone’s mouth is going to be two words, “Ronald Reagan” and he was president for two terms.

Presidential conventions should be focused on politics and what the two candidates promise they will do if elected. They should not be big budget Hollywood style spectacles.

People should be talking about what it was the candidates said or did not say in their speeches. That’s more important if not far more newsworthy than seeing an Oscar winning director/actor talk to an empty chair that was an imaginary President Obama.

I did not see Mitt Romney’s speech in its entirety but judging what I did hear I didn’t think it was anything worth remembering. There is something wrong when a Hollywood icon steals the show for 11 minutes to the point everyone is talking about it on Twitter the next day and posting pictures of themselves pointing to an empty chair in what is now called “Eastwooding.”

In fact, I am willing to bet this blog is being read by a lot of empty chairs.

Even my dog is doing it sitting up looking at an empty chair right now.

That is until I realized the person sitting in the empty chair was me. Like President Obama, who not only had a sense of humor about Eastwood’s speech saying, “One thing about being president or running for president – if you’re easily offended, you should probably choose another profession,” but also tweeted a quick response on Twitter following the actor’s speech, I too told my dog, “This seat’s taken.

©9/3/12

Gone Too Soon: Tony Scott (1944-2012)

The game of life is hard to play
I'm gonna lose it anyway
The losing card I'll someday lay
So this is all I have to say

A number of thoughts came to mind upon hearing that famed Hollywood director Tony Scott, 68, had jumped to his death off the Vincent Thomas Bridge, Aug. 19, which is still being investigated as a suicide. The first of which were the lyrics I posted above from that Johnny Mandel song, “Suicide Is Painless”, which was the theme song from Robert Altman’s "M*A*S*H" (1970).

Upon reading some of the obituaries the morning of Aug. 20 the one thought I had that I didn’t even want to consider was when it comes to depression and suicide was that for all the work Scott did behind the cameras since the 1980s giving us such fast paced adrenaline rush themed movies from "Top Gun" (1986) to "Unstoppable" (2010) that on the inside, something was not right.

I hated to say it but when ABC News reported that Scott had been diagnosed with inoperable brain cancer, which was immediately disputed by his family, I reluctantly said to myself, well at least he went out on his own terms.

I only say that because I have known people which include a few of my relatives who although they didn’t choose the suicidal way out upon being diagnosed with a terminal illness, they did opt to spend their remaining days and weeks at home where they could die with dignity and not have to spend it inside a hospital room.

It brought to mind the question of how I would handle my own fate should I one day receive some terrible diagnosis that if I found out, for example, what I thought was just a bad tooth that was causing mood swings and headaches is really an inoperable brain tumor. How would I tell friends and loved ones considering how private a person I am?

The first thing I may do is just let my four or five closest friends know that the end is coming and how I want the final arrangements handled. I am not sure I would tell family members as the last thing I’d want is to have them insist I go get a second opinion. I certainly wouldn’t tell co-workers or management or tell everyone on my Facebook page. I would just want life to continue as though everything is status quo. I am not spending my remaining months in the hospital receiving painful treatment that only delays the inevitable.

The news now that the notes Scott left with friends and family members which make no mention of suffering from any terminal illnesses only leave more open-ended questions as to why he did it.

The 68-year-old director whose trademark was always being seen in public sporting a red ball cap was high in demand with a number of film projects in the works according to The Hollywood Reporter that included a remake of Sam Peckinpah’s western, "The Wild Bunch" (1969). Just two days before his death, Scott had reportedly met with actor Tom Cruise to discuss plans for a sequel to "Top Gun."

What kind of person who has so much going for him this late in life decides to end it?

I wonder if the answer lies in a quote from him, I found on imdb.com.

“The scariest thing in my life is the first morning of production on all my movies,” Scott once said. “It’s the fear of failing, the loss of face, and a sense of guilt that everybody puts their faith in you and not coming through.”

Tony Scott may have been a high-profile Hollywood producer and director with an impressive resume of successful box office hits but when it comes to depression, if that is what he was really suffering from, he is no more different than the millions of others across the country who currently battle the same ailment and too often give in to their demons.

I know a lot of people are going to tell me what Scott did was the selfish way out considering the number of friends and family that include his older brother Ridley, his third wife, Donna, and two children he could have relied on for help. My response to that is it’s not our place to judge nor is it any of our business to find out what he wrote in those notes.

I don’t know, to quote Johnny Mandel’s lyrics, if “suicide is painless” nor do I want to know. If there is anything proven by Tony Scott’s untimely death it is when one decides to take their own life, it does as Mandel sang “bring on many changes.”

Just look at the shock and sadness Scott’s fans, friends, family and the many actors and actresses he directed in movies the past three decades are feeling now as they ask “Why did he do it” only to come back with the same answer every time which is we’ll probably never know.

©8/29/12

Controversial Obama “mockumentary” won’t influence 2012 presidential election

I remember the day like it was yesterday. The date was June 28, 2004. I attended an afternoon screening of Michael Moore’s "Fahrenheit 9/11."

As I heard thunderous applause emanating from the audience when the end credits rolled, I took note of the comment I overheard from the two audience members who were apparently so blindsided by the many untruths told in Moore’s movie that one of them said they are never voting Republican again.

It’s not their comment that ticked me off so much as it was their blind stupidity into accepting everything Hollywood just told them on the big screen is in fact the truth.

The one and only goal filmmakers like Michael Moore do with so-called documentaries like Fahrenheit 9/11 is to help sway public opinion. The same can now be said for the latest “documentary” 2016: Obama’s America which is seeing a surge in box office revenue (not that the Republican National Convention in Tampa, Florida had anything to do with it) and an unexpected expansion from less than 200 to now over 1000 screens across the country. As of this writing, the film’s Facebook page has over 172,000 likes and over 185,000 people talking about it.

Just like Moore’s film was a rallying cry for anyone still ticked off at the time at how former President George W. Bush (2001-2009) stole the election from former Democratic presidential candidate, Al Gore, in 2000 and took us into two wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, 2016: Obama’s America might as well be called the “Conservatives Fahrenheit 9/11” as narrator Dinesh D’Souza, based on his books "The Roots of Obama’s Rage" and "Obama’s America: Unmaking the American Dream" rips President Obama to shreds.

I won’t deny the film made me think how four years from now America will not be called “America” but “Amerika” with a “k” when it comes to President Obama’s socialist policies (though I believe in reality, America actually follows a form of socialism anyway and people simply just don’t realize it).

Even before the film started, I heard cheers coming from a few people several rows above me. That happened when conservative political commentator Glenn Beck showed up doing some promotional trailer, I didn’t pay much attention to though hearing those audience members applaud literally made me die laughing.

Just as I laughed at how a couple of the trailers before the film began catered to the conservative base which included "Atlas Shrugged: Part II" based on author Ayn Rand’s mammoth book and "Trouble with the Curve" starring Clint Eastwood who recently came out in support of Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney.

Honestly, "2016: Obama’s America: 2016" did not reveal to me anything that I hadn’t already heard the past four years listening to conservative talk radio. Like "Fahrenheit 9/11" I saw the film as entertainment and took 99 percent of the film’s statements (i.e.: Obama reducing our nuclear arsenals to less than 300 in the coming years or his being pro-Muslim for example) with a considerable grain of salt. If the president is so pro-Muslim as the film proposes, why did he continue what former Presidents Clinton (1993-2001) and Bush do and pledge to kill Osama bin Laden if elected? Every time I hear how President Obama has been outspending the country into oblivion, I hear how the budgets of previous presidents were even worse.

I don’t need a “mockumentary” to make my decision on whether or not I think President Obama does not deserve a second term. My personal reasons on why he shouldn’t be re-elected again are mine and mine alone just as I don’t believe voters should be telling others who they are voting for. It’s no one else’s business.

I don’t believe for a minute "2016: Obama’s America" will sway this November’s election. It didn’t work when "Fahrenheit 9/11" which was also released months before the 2004 election either.

The idea that Michael Moore and Dinesh D’Souza are so powerful that their words and actions are able to sway the outcome of a presidential election is like saying the views and opinions expressed by conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh represents everything the Republican party stands for.

©8/27/12

New Paterno biography won’t change my negative opinion of football legend

"Say it ain’t so, Joe.”

Such was the line supposedly said by a young kid to White Sox player “Shoeless Joe” Jackson back in September 1920 after being investigated by a grand jury that he and seven other teammates took part in an attempt to fix the World Series in what became known as the Black Sox Scandal.

As a result of that, Jackson, along with his seven teammates, were banned from major league baseball.

That quote may have been the stuff of baseball legend. I can’t help but wonder, however, if the faithful fans who stood by former Penn State University Football Coach Joe Paterno weren’t thinking the same thing following the release in July of "The Freeh Report" surrounding the child-sex scandal involving former Penn State assistant football coach Jerry Sandusky that among many things laid the blame for not doing enough to stop the abuse on Paterno’s doorstep.

When the scandal broke last November I told a few people I knew that Penn State’s Board of Trustees were right in firing “Joe Pa.” Among the responses I got to that was “Don’t blame Joe.” “Don’t be going all out rushing to judgment.” “Wait to find out how Penn State’s human resources department handled it” were among some of the statements said to me.

What I got in reading the report’s findings is it was clear to me that JOE PATERNO WAS HUMAN RESOURCES when it came to keeping the sex abuse charges under the rug all for the good of Happy Valley’s beloved football program.

"The evidence shows that Mr. Paterno was made aware of the 1998 investigation of Sandusky, followed it closely, but failed to take any action, even though Sandusky had been a key member of his coaching staff for almost 30 years, and had an office just steps away from Mr. Paterno's," the report read.  "At the very least, Mr. Paterno could have alerted the entire football staff, in order to prevent Sandusky from bringing another child into the Lasch Building. Messrs. (Graham) Spanier, (Gary) Schultz, Paterno and (Tim) Curley also failed to alert the Board of Trustees about the 1998 investigation or take any further action against Mr. Sandusky. None of them even spoke to Sandusky about his conduct. In short, nothing was done, and Sandusky was allowed to continue with impunity."

Watching Penn State students make jackasses of themselves last November flipping cars over in reaction to Paterno’s firing not only made me want to yell at the television, “Oh how proud the parents must be of all their idiot sons and daughters knowing this is what their hard-earned money pays for in tuition.” The incidents once again demonstrated what happens when people put such idols, be it athletic coaches, athletes, Hollywood icons and presidents, past and present on high pedestals thinking they can do no wrong, only to get blindsided the minute it turns out they weren’t as perfect as they thought they were.

I haven’t picked up author Joseph Posnanski’s biography, "Paterno", which hit bookstands Aug. 21. Quite frankly, I have about as much desire to read, as Entertainment Weekly writer Chris Nashawaty describes in his review of the book, about the Nittany Lyons’ coaching legend’s “undefeated seasons, bowl games, and anecdotes from past gridiron greats about their playing days in Happy Valley” as I do in searching eBay for a copy of Jerry Sandusky’s 2000 autobiography, "Touched." In short, I’ll put my money to better use elsewhere like on gas.

The best quotes I have found don’t come from the Paterno biography but from author Posnanski.

“When people ask me if Penn State was right in tearing down Joe Paterno's statue in light of the Freeh Report's conclusion, I ask a different question: "Should they have built a statue to him in the first place?", Posnanski wrote in a recent sports column in USA Today. “When people ask me if the NCAA was right in unleashing draconian penalties against Penn State, I ask a different question: "Should they have held up Joe Paterno as a paragon of purity and virtue for more than four decades?"

Such is the reason why I will never look up to such notable celebrities, whether they are in politics, in entertainment or in athletics. If you are looking for someone to model yourself after, try starting with your own parents or grandparents, provided they raised you right.

I know there are probably still many out there that includes Penn State students past and present who will argue I should remember all the good things Joe Paterno did in his 85 years which I am sure is all chronicled in Posnanski’s book. I am sure they all say I should look past what occurred last November to the time he passed away in January this year to the release of The Freeh Report and its aftermath.

My answer to that is if the American people refused to forgive President Richard Nixon for covering up a break-in at the Democratic National Committee headquarters at the Watergate offices in June 1972, why should I even bother forgiving Joe Paterno for only giving a damn about preserving the reputation of his prestigious athletic football program and doing little to nothing about protecting young kids from a convicted child rapist.

If I am to believe Posnanski’s biography, however, my guess is “Joe Pa” does not care what I think from even beyond the grave.

“[The criticism] really doesn’t matter,” Posnanski wrote in the book of his last conversation with Paterno quoting him. “It really doesn’t. I know what I tried to do. Maybe somebody will see that in time. Maybe they won’t. Maybe they will judge me by what I tried to do. Maybe they won’t. What difference does it make? I just hope there is justice for the victims.”

I am not one of those people who will change my negative opinion of him. Joe Paterno’s final legacy will always be in his own words what he said after the scandal broke.

“This is a tragedy. It is one of the great sorrows of my life. With the benefit of hindsight, I wish I had done more.”

So do we “Joe Pa”, so do we.

©8/23/12

Why I still prefer to see the old classics on the big screen – especially if they are in IMAX

There is a scene in an episode of "Seinfeld" (1990-1998) where Kramer (Michael Richards) runs a movie theater that is showing "Spartacus" (1960).

In response to hearing that, George Costanza (Jason Alexander) asks Kramer “Why would I spend seven dollars to see a movie that I could watch on TV?”

“Well, why go to a fine restaurant when you can just stick something in the microwave,” Kramer fires back. “Why go to the park and fly a kite when you can just pop a pill?”

Yes, it’s true. "Raiders of the Lost Ark" (1981), (it is not called "Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark" regardless of what the front covers of the DVD copies say) has been on cable television so many times over the past three decades that it might make one ask the exact same question grumpy George asks Kramer.

Why go see three-time Oscar winning director Steven Spielberg’s 1981 adventure classic starring Harrison Ford in theaters for a one-week only engagement on IMAX screens beginning Sept. 7 in celebration of the film’s first-time release on Blu-ray Sept. 18 along with "Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom" (1984) and "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade" (1989)?

I get into an insulting mood when such negative Nancy's ask that so here, I go.

“It’s because the film’s being shown again after thirty years on the big screen, dummy!”

It’s the same reason why I saw "Citizen Kane" (1941), "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" (1971), "Giant" (1965), "The Godfather" (1972), "The Exorcist" (1973), "Grease" (1978), "Apocalypse Now" (1979) and "The Shining" (1980) on the big screen over the years.

I don’t know if I’ll be able to truly tell the difference between the 81’ print I saw 31 years ago and on cable over the years and the cleaned up digital print of "Raiders of the Lost Ark" whereas Spielberg said on movie talk when the giant boulder rolls down after Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford) if I’ll “see it in full size” and will feel it in my stomach.

Those aren’t the things I’ll be looking for when I see it. What I will be looking for and what will most definitely happen during either the early Monday morning or afternoon showing is the feeling of nostalgia.

I got that same feeling when I saw the 1997 special edition of "Star Wars" at Dallas’ Northpark I & II theater which closed in 1998 and was torn down soon after. Seeing that Rebel Blockade Runner being chased in outer space by an immense Star Destroyer in Star Wars brought back memories of the first time I saw the film in August 1977 with my parents. It was what movies are supposed to do – take us into a whole new world for a couple hours – something a majority of today’s motion pictures fail miserably at.

Watching Raiders again will remind me of how when the film first came out, videocassette recorders were still in their infancy. Mom and pop video stores were beginning to show up all over town. There was no such place as Blockbuster Video where one might be lucky to get their hands of a major title provided the stores ordered over 100 rental copies.

When movies back then were released on VHS videocassette the retail price, if you felt like shelling out your money at that time was $79 bucks for a new copy. Very few titles were released at sell thru. "Raiders of the Lost Ark" was the first VHS title I got as a Christmas present in 1983 from my grandparents along with our first hulking silver Sears VCR that whenever I had to take it in for repairs was so heavy one could get a hernia lifting it.

Movie theaters back then were different as well. They were not the 30 screen multiplexes we got today where kids could play arcade games in the lobby. When a major blockbuster such as Raiders was released on June 14, 1981, it was not on 4000 plus screens across the country like 'The Dark Knight Rises' was shown in opening weekend in July. The number of screens Raiders was shown in was 1,078 back then and its opening weekend gross was just over $8 million while the budget was estimated to be $18 million. Compare that to the over inflated budgets of today’s box office bombs ('John Carter', 'Battleship') that fail to draw in the crowds.

There is something else about seeing 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' again that shows just how much movies since then have changed versus the stuff being churned out by Hollywood today. The films I saw of yesteryear such as 'Airplane' (1980), "Animal House" (1978) and "The Poseidon Adventure" (1972) for example, were all movies I couldn’t wait to see again and often do whenever they are on cable today. The one and only movie I saw more than once in the last ten years at theaters was "Star Trek" (2009).

That’s a feeling I just don’t have viewing today’s films. Just the idea that Spielberg is now considering perhaps putting "Close Encounters of the Third Kind" (1977) for IMAX according to Movie Talk only makes me drool at other possibilities of what it would be like to see such oldies I don’t get tired of seeing again like "The Towering Inferno" (1974), the Star Wars trilogy (1977-1983) and NO not the special editions, and even Spielberg’s own "Saving Private Ryan" (1998) shown in the same format. I got hope that maybe as popular as IMAX is getting to releasing old classics like Raiders could be the start of a trend.

Now if someone can just convince producer George Lucas to please drop the “Indiana Jones” from the film’s title and call Spielberg’s movie what it was called 31 years ago when it first came out, "Raiders of the Lost Ark."

©8/20/12

McKayla Maroney is everywhere

“It is pretty funny.”

So said 16-year-old Olympic gymnast McKayla Maroney when asked by David Letterman in her Aug. 14 appearance on The Late Show about that infamous “not impressed” shot seen around the world after being awarded the silver medal that has now taken on a viral life of its own on the Internet.

As a result, McKayla Maroney is probably going to be one of the few Olympic athletes whose fifteen minutes of fame may go on for much longer thanks to 28-year-old Gavin Aloen’s clever meme on Tumblr called “McKayla Is Not Impressed” where her image is now incorporated into everything from travel pictures to movies to meetings with real life figures. She was not impressed, for example, by Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney’s pick of Paul Ryan for Vice President Aug. 13.

I doubt going into the Summer Olympics if Maroney expected her disapproving look to reach the height of hilarious proportions.

She is only 16 years old and yet she has traveled to more places in so short a span of time than any of us could have imagined.

McKayla is not impressed with the Mars rover Curiosity.

I wonder what the NASA technicians were thinking the minute the Mars rover Curiosity sent back a photo of Maroney in her spacesuit boasting that “not impressed” look. In Maroney’s defense, can you blame her? Here she is on a planet that is nothing but red rocks, sand and ice and no one to talk to save for her communications with the Pentagon telling them on a daily basis that she is “not impressed.”

Either that, when the gymnast came across those Martians, she didn’t care much for the greeting they gave her with a sign that said “F--- off. Go home!!!”

Now why am I not surprised that even aliens in outer space don’t want us visiting their planets?

McKayla is not impressed with The Hunger Games.

Maroney may have been born in 1995 but believe it or not, she was at the World Trade Center on August 7, 1974, when Phillippe Petit did his high wire walk between the Twin Towers. Look real closely at that "Man On Wire" photo and you will find her in the same outfit she was wearing when being given the silver medal 38 years later standing on the roof of one of the towers. I wonder if once Petit completed his stunt if Maroney told him she was “not impressed.”

George Lucas may have made film producer Kathleen Kennedy his heir apparent when he retires from Lucasfilm and the Star Wars franchise soon. I have a feeling; however, the creator of The Force will come out of retirement again just to tinker one more time with the original Star Wars trilogy (1977-1983). Or maybe he has done so already, and the images posted on the McKayla Is Not Impressed website are a taste of what we will get when another Blu-ray edition is released years from now.

I would like to think, no, actually I hope, the scene of Maroney’s not impressed image at the end of "Star Wars" (1977) during the awards ceremony standing beside the droids C3P0 and R2D2 and other rebel leaders as Luke Skywalker (Mark Hamill) and Han Solo (Harrison Ford) are awarded their “gold” medallions is just an April Fool's joke.

Maroney's second vault at the 2012 Olympics.

All kidding aside, however, despite losing her chance at the gold medal upon failing to land on her feet in her second vault jump at the Aug. 5 games, Maroney should still be proud of herself. She is only 16 and she still has plenty of time to work on winning that gold medal again.

“It happens,” Maroney said afterwards in a New York Times article. “It’s gymnastics, and you can’t be perfect. Sometimes, things don’t go as planned. I don’t blame it on anything else. I just messed up.”

There is nothing wrong with an athlete setting their sights too high only to have it come crashing down in an instant. It’s called competition and the desire to be the best. Maroney’s image is just one disapproving look. I can’t count how many pictures I have seen on the Internet of auto racer Danica Patrick not looking all too happy at the races over the years.

Every Olympian athlete is always remembered for something. I remember swimmer Amanda Beard making her first appearance at the 1996 Atlanta Olympic Games at age 14 holding her teddy bear. I know I won’t forget Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh Jennings third gold medal victory at this year’s events.

McKayla is not impressed with the Peanuts gang.

If there is one thing I prefer to remember about McKayla Maroney it isn’t that negative facial expression being awarded the silver medal. It is the fact at how she has since been able to have a sense of humor about the whole thing even joining in on the fun posting a picture of herself showing her displeasure alongside fellow teammates Kyla Ross and Aly Raisman tweeting, “The pool is closed. #not impressed.”

The day after her Letterman appearance, Maroney reposted a pic off the meme Tumblr website to her twitter account showing her famous pose in animated form with the Charlie Brown gang. At the bottom of the cartoon was the caption, “ice cream, pretzels, toast and jellybeans. Not impressed.”

“I just died” laughing, she tweeted on her account.

©8/15/12

I still don't know who shot J.R. Ewing

“Bless me father for I have sinned. It’s been over 15 years since my last confession. I still don’t know who shot J.R. Ewing in the original long running soap opera drama series, Dallas, that ran on CBS from 1978 to 1991.”

I must have broken some unwritten commandment. When I posted the comment on Facebook the night of June 13, 2012 that in the twenty years since the soap opera drama, Dallas, went off the air, I still don’t know who shot Texas oil tycoon J.R. Ewing (Larry Hagman), a friend on my page responded back to my post saying for me to “Please turn in my man card right now.”

Up until then I had no idea I actually had a “man card.”

My not knowing who shot J.R. Ewing is not the only piece of useless “Dallas” trivia I know nothing about. I’ll have you know looking over that ten question quiz about the television series in the June 2012 issue of D magazine, I also have no idea what show beat the Nov. 21, 1980 Who shot J.R. episode in 1983, what role Brad Pitt played in the series or what Texas governor was featured in the Ewing Rodeo episode? And no I had no idea there was a rodeo episode.

That’s not to say I never watched the original series. I know die-hard fans of America’s dysfunctional greedy first family of the “Lone Star State” will say this doesn’t count. I did, however, watch the final two-hour series finale in 1991, which was a rendition of A Christmas Carol where the devil, played by Joel Grey, shows J.R. how much life would be better for everyone if he hadn’t been born. The only reason I watched that episode is I make it a habit to catch every finale of a show that’s been on for more than five years even though I never watched the series the whole time it was on.

If I add up those two hours I spent on that fateful night May 3, 1991, 21 years ago, it doesn’t even come close to the time I spent over the summer watching the new series which comes out to around 45 minutes. I did watch the first two episodes in June and when I say “watch” it means I had the TV on while I was doing stuff on the computer occasionally looking away and then back again.

I actually remember the times I did actually stop what I was doing, three to be exact. There was the opening scene of Bobby Ewing (Patrick Duffy) at the doctor’s office being told he has terminal cancer, the scene where Bobby visits J.R. at a hospital and the final scene where family conspirators, Marta Del Sol (Leonor Varela) and John Ross (Josh Henderson) meet up on the 50-yard line at Cowboys Stadium. I wonder if God was looking down on them from the Heavens the way people believe the reason there is a hole in the roof of Cowboys stadium is because the Almighty likes to watch his favorite team play.

There are only two things I learned paying very little attention to the new series over the summer, okay three. One, I have now added another item to my bucket list of things I want to do that I seriously doubt I will ever accomplish before I die which is to one day feel a big block of frozen methane to see if it is really hot when you touch it.

Two, I learned that J.R. and I actually have one thing in common which is we are not that fond of today’s technology as he doesn’t care for communicating via email either.

“Old fogeys like me don't e-mail darlin',” J.R. says in episode 2. “We talk to each other, personally.” Or in my case, I just don’t say anything and blog my thoughts in long winded columns.

And three, when it came to my deciding what to watch the night of August 8 be it either the season one finale of Dallas or to see volleyball champions Misty May-Treanor and Kerri Walsh Jennings win their third gold medal at the Olympics, I chose female eye candy in skimpy bikini outfits over the Ewings. Seeing Misty May-Treanor do a little victory dance on the sand only comes once in a lifetime, especially since I have yet to see a clip of it on YouTube.

So those of you die-hard Texans and devoted Dallas fans demanding I turn in my “man card”, I am more than happy to surrender it to you. Just tell me what it looks like. Is it shaped like the state of Texas on that NC-17 movie poster of "Killer Joe" that looks like a deep-fried mozzarella stick? Should I turn my storage shed upside down going through years of old magazines, comic books, movie posters, computer equipment, printers and old newspapers to find it?

Perhaps I left it in several boxes of Star Wars toys I have been selling to a local dealer the past ten months. You think if I ask the dealer if he found a “man card” inside some of the stuff I gave him would he know what I am talking about?

If, and when I do find this “man card” you people demand I hand over, could you also do me the favor and tell me who shot J.R.? That would really save me the trouble of the penance the priest told me I must do in order to be forgiven, and that’s having to sit through 356 hours of 356 episodes of a long running soap opera drama I was not the least bit interested in watching back when it first aired decades ago.

©8/12/12

Forgiving others of the most heinous crimes depends on how strong one’s faith is

“I guess the question Joe is when Jesus said to “pray for your enemies,” which enemy did he say to not pray for?”

So said a friend of mine, who is a lot more religious than I am, when I shared a recent news story with him following the mass shooting in Aurora, Colorado, July 20, where during a memorial service July 22 for Gordon Cowden, one of 12 victims killed that night, pastor Robert Gelinas asked the congregation to pray for shooter James Holmes.

"Only God is the righteous judge," Gelinas said. "Only God knows how to blend justice and mercy and grace in perfect balance. We lift this man up before God, and say, 'God, do what you need to do in this situation.'"

“What this pastor did should not be the exception but the rule,” my friend said. “Remember, while we live in this world, we are not of this world. Not easy being a Catholic.”

I admit I am not a very religious person and haven’t been for a while, though I do in times of trouble recite the Hail Mary and often the prayer to St. Jude who is the patron saint of lost souls, my being one of them.

When it comes to the many acts of evil I have read and seen perpetrated by people as reported in the news and the Internet on a daily basis, one of the first things I say to myself is my favorite line from "Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan" (1982).

“Revenge is a dish best served cold.”

Like everyone else in the country who celebrated in front of the White House and at Ground Zero last May, I too took to the social networking world of Facebook and blogged my glee writing of Osama bin Laden’s bloody demise at the hands of our armed forces.

If I were going to do any praying for Jerry Sandusky, the former Penn State assistant football coach who was found guilty in June on 45 of 48 counts of child sexual abuse, it would be to hope he’d finally one day realize while spending life in prison that what he did to those ten young boys, if not more, was wrong. I know that’s never going to happen whether I pray or not.

I won’t lie to you. The first question I asked upon hearing about James Holmes’ shooting spree was where is Paul Kersey when you need him, in reference to the New York vigilante character Charles Bronson played in "Death Wish" (1974) and four forgettable follow-ups throughout the 1980s and mid-90s. If only someone with a license to carry a firearm had been inside theater 9 that night. I was so upset by what Holmes did to those people that I refused to name him in my July 21, 2012 blog I wrote.

Now having read a few opinions from those injured in the shooting to those who say we should not only pray for the victims but for Holmes as well and not give him the death penalty has given me pause.

Now I am wondering if those of us who celebrated bin Laden’s death, told Sandusky to “burn in Hell” as he was led off to jail following his guilty verdict, want James Holmes to be brought before a firing squad and leave comments at the end of news stories offering up even more graphic details of what they’d like to see done to the killer, if maybe it’s us who are wrong and it’s the ones who actually forgive the shooter are right regardless of the many questions from upset readers chiming in writing, “What if it had been your six-year-old daughter who was killed that night? Would you be so forgiving?”

It’s so much easier to spout off hateful vengeful comments than it is to forgive. Just ask 28-year-old Pierce O’Farrill who was shot three times in the July 20 shooting.

“I forgive him with all my heart,” O’Farrill said in an interview with The Denver Post. “When I saw him (Holmes) in his hearing, I felt nothing but sorrow for him—he’s just a lost soul right now. I want to see him some time. The first thing I want to say to him is ‘I forgive you’ and the next is, ‘Can I pray for you?’”

"This is going to be hard for people to understand, but I feel sorry for him," O’Farrill told The Christian Post. "When I think what that soul must be like to have that much hatred and that much anger in his heart- what every day must be like. I can't imagine getting out of bed every morning and having that much anger and hatred for people that he undoubtedly has. I'm not angry at him. I'll pray for him."

Justin Davis, who was also inside theater 9 when the shootings happened but was unharmed said in an interview with ABC News that it’s his faith that suggests Holmes deserves forgiveness.

“We should just forgive, and you don’t know what he’s going through,” Davis said. “You don’t know why he did it.”

Inside the Peñasquitos Lutheran Church in San Diego where Holmes’ parents attend, signs are posted inside saying, “Prayers for those affected by the Colorado tragedy” and “Prayers for the Holmes family” according to an article on The Huffington Post.

Then there is Byron Thomas’ post on YouTube which was posted on CNN’s website asking the country to not call for Holmes to receive the death penalty.

“We are going to have to show James Holmes mercy, forgiveness, and LOVE. These are the same things Jesus commanded us to do and what he showed us when he died on the cross for ALL of our sins,” Thomas said. “My heart goes out toward those families and because this was nevertheless tragic. I just believe we should let the court system handle it and not protest for James Holmes to get the death penalty. As a Christian I just don’t believe in the death penalty.”

I don’t know if I could find it in my heart to forgive James Holmes. I have come to terms that mass shootings could and have often happened once too often in the workplace, in restaurants, in our nation’s schools, on college campuses and at places of worship. I know shooting incidents often happen inside movie theaters, but I never expected it to be the equivalent of the carnage that happened July 20.

As someone whose favorite pastime is often spending it inside a dark theater every few weeks, seeing movies was that last place of refuge where I believed for at least a few hours I could get away from the horrors of the outside world and where I would never have to worry about someone walking in ready to go postal. Now thanks to Holmes those days are over much the way we must forever be on our guard when flying thanks to the 9/11 hijackers.

I suppose, though, the fact that I am even blogging about this realizing that maybe I should not only pray for the victims but also for the ones who have committed the most heinous of crimes is a good start, even if I don’t have the strength to forgive.

In some sick twisted way, tortured souls like James Holmes are hurting inside. We just don’t know how much and why. I don’t really think we’ll ever know.

©8/6/12

Attempting to find entertainment value in movies after art tragically imitates life

I have seen a lot of death and destruction in my 40 plus years.

In movies and television shows that is. If I added up the number of fictional characters I have seen killed on the big and small screen, I don’t think those statistics would come anywhere close to the number of innocent civilians senselessly gunned down over the course of a year here in this country. The number of fictional fatalities I have seen wiped out in movies and TV shows has got to be in the millions or more.

It goes without saying. When the lights dim and we settle down in our theater seats with our large, hopefully hot, and not cold stale bucket of buttered popcorn and large coke and a couple hot dogs one hopes has not been sitting in the oven since the theater first opened years ago, we hope that for more than a couple hours we are allowed to escape into a different world to get away from the grim realities of life outside, even if the lives of beloved characters on the big screen are cut short in some latest big screen comic book adaptation, disaster, gangster, horror or science fiction movie.

After all, it’s only a movie, right?

Within an hour of taking in the endless 24/7 - 9/11 style news coverage from Aurora, Colorado the morning of July 20 where, to quote Colorado Democratic Rep. Ed Perlmutter in an interview with 850 KOA News Radio in Denver, “a psychotic son of a bitch” shot 70 moviegoers at a midnight screening of "The Dark Knight Rises" that left 12 dead and 58 injured, my desire to see what was and maybe still is despite the tragic events, the summer’s most anticipated blockbuster quickly diminished. For a brief moment that is.

My first reaction to what happened Friday morning was the same as on September 11, 2001 when 19 terrorist/hijackers took over four jetliners slamming the first three into the World Trade Center’s twin towers and the Pentagon before passengers bravely stopped the fourth from making its way to what was believed to be either the U.S. Capitol or the White House, losing their lives in the process.

I was angry that someone with no regard for human life could walk in during a movie and start firing at anyone who moved like he was playing his own personal violent video game. What did any of those people in theater 9 do to make him go on a killing spree?

I was so sickened by this that I refused to name the 24-year-old suspect in this column. I feel the SOB does not deserve any more attention than what he is already getting from the media and what I can only assume in his own twisted mind wanted when he began planning this atrocity months ago.

Just as I did on 9/11, I shed several tears for the victims.

As unbearably sad and unfortunate as this is, what happened July 20 could have happened at any major screening of an anticipated summer blockbuster on opening night in a sold-out theater full of people. It could have happened during the first midnight screening of "The Avengers" in May somewhere in Anytown, USA. I wish there was an easy solution to the problem but it's the times we live in. We just aren't completely safe anymore no matter where we go be it the nation’s schools, college campuses, the local malls, movie theaters, restaurants, sporting events and even church.  

I am, however, and anyone else for that matter who shares the same belief, are only letting as former President George W. Bush (2001-2009) often referred to throughout his presidency the “evil doers” win if I say I’ll never again attend a midnight screening at the local theater out of fear of what some other mentally disturbed, disgruntled P.O.S./SOB might do opening night.

Movies are still as "The Dark Knight Rises" director Christopher Nolan said, "one of the great American art forms and the shared experience of watching a story unfold on screen is an important and joyful pastime."

The tragedy in Aurora, Colorado will not stop me from catching the first afternoon screening of "The Dark Knight Rises" at an IMAX theater a couple days from now. I won’t feel any uneasiness watching such unsettling action sequences of school children in buses in danger as city bridges are blown up, NFL players are wiped out during a football game and shootouts at Gotham City’s stock exchange; scenes of which were shown in the trailer.

I know in the end good will triumph over evil like it always does 99 percent of the time in the movies. Just as it did early Friday morning in real life when police caught “The Joker” at his car outside the theater and immediately took him into custody.

The only difference now as I make my weekly or bi-weekly pilgrimages to the local multiplex on my days off and sit in the first five rows of the bottom floor of the auditorium, I may, out of the corner of my eye, occasionally keep a close watch on anyone coming out or coming in through those exit doors as I am watching the film.

©7/21/12

Not on board with "Titanic" fever

The 100th anniversary of the Titanic disaster has come and gone, and I am not the least bit sorry I missed it much less cared.

I did not take the Titanic Memorial Cruise that 1,309 passengers did when the MS Balmoral set sail on April 8 from Southampton, England to retrace the original’s ill-fated voyage. Though I did wonder had the Balmoral hit an iceberg at exactly 11:40 p.m. on April 14, 2012, if the ocean liner had enough lifeboats for everyone aboard or did they really want to go all out and recreate the tragic mistakes of 100 years ago.

Unlike the first-class passengers aboard the Titanic who sat down for a 10-course meal that fateful night which included oysters, filet mignon, poached salmon, chicken Lyonnaise, foie gras, roasted pigeon, lamb with mint sauce, and Punch Romaine according to an article on npr.org which diners can purchase at Hong Kong’s Hullett House Hotel for $1390 (US dollars), my dinner stateside on April 14, 2012 consisted of a six-inch cold cut double meat sandwich from Subway on wheat with lettuce, tomatoes, olives, pickles and mustard, a large iced tea (unsweetened), a bag of whole grain chips and three chocolate chip cookies. All of which cost me a little over $10 bucks, which to me is rather expensive.

I have not seen ABC’s "Titanic", the four-hour mini-series that aired last weekend though I will likely see it upon its release on Blu-ray. If for no other reason just to say I saw it and add it to the other movie and made-for-tv reincarnations of the catastrophe I have seen that include "A Night to Remember" (1958), and the 53’, 79’ and 96’ versions that starred Clifton Webb, David Janssen, George C. Scott and Catherine Zeta-Jones. Let’s not forget "Raise the Titanic" (1980) which was a disaster in itself, both critical and box office wise that is.

I have not bought any of the newly released or re-released books published about the disaster I have seen sitting on tables and end caps at Barnes & Noble. Quite frankly, there are so many out there I wouldn’t even know which ones to get. I am willing to bet a lot of what’s in those books is information that’s already been regurgitated in several others written about the sinking the past ten decades. Other than the screenplay of James Cameron’s Oscar winning 1997 film, the only other books I have which I think cover everything I ever wanted to know about the ship “God himself couldn’t sink” is "Titanic: An Illustrated History", "Unsinkable" by Daniel Allen Butler, and of course, Walter Lord’s "A Night to Remember."

Unlike 101 year-old Rose Dewitt Bukater (Gloria Stewart) who journeys back to Titanic’s dark icy underwater ruins after a group of salvagers, led by Bill Paxton, find a nude drawing of her as a young woman wearing “the Heart of the Ocean” in Cameron’s blockbuster, I have not and will not make that return trip to the “ship of dreams” to see the film again, this time in the 3D and IMAX 3D formats, unless I am on a date and the woman I go out with wants to see it.

I won’t deny that 15 years ago I embraced Cameron’s disaster epic. I saw it at least five times, maybe more on the big screen back then. I am not going to tell you whether or not I shed any tears when the band played "Nearer, My God, to Thee" as passengers tried to save themselves and builder Thomas Andrews (Victor Garber) set his pocket watch for the end to come as he gazed at a painting believed to be artist Norman Wilkinson’s “The Approach to Plymouth Harbour” in the first class smoking room.

I am not like Joey Tribiani (Matt LeBlanc) in that "Friends" episode who when Chandler (Matthew Perry) mocks him about how he cries every time someone talks about Titanic, Joey chokes up and says, “Those two (Kate Winslet and Leonardo Dicaprio’s characters) only had each other.”

I won’t tell you if I cheered like a lot of movie goers did, which I am sure were all women, when the younger Rose (Kate Winslet) spat in villain and husband to be (Billy Zane) Cal Hockley’s face before running off to rescue lover Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio).

Although I don’t feel like throwing up the way star Kate Winslet does today every time she hears Celine Dion’s “My Heart Will Go On” from the film, my interest in the disaster is about as rusted out as the ship’s remains resting at the bottom of the Atlantic. As many times as I have seen Titanic, I don’t think I can sit and watch it again, not even when it comes to Blu-ray this September. Whenever I see it air on the cable networks now every few months, the only reason I have it on is just to have something to listen to while I am doing something else.

There is, however, an even deeper reason why I was not on board in commemorating the maritime disaster 100 years ago. Embarking on a “Titanic” cruise to take the same route the original ocean liner took where over 1500 people perished is about as macabre and unsettling as seeing the three-hour plus epic again on the big screen, even if it is a love story.

Maybe it’s me but I just wouldn’t feel right celebrating as James Cameron did upon winning the Best Picture Oscar in 1998 at the 70th Annual Academy Awards telling the audience to “Let’s go party until dawn” after asking for a brief moment of silence for the more than 1500 men, women and children who went down with the ship 100 years ago.

©4/18/12